{"id":15988,"date":"2015-08-22T19:27:25","date_gmt":"2015-08-22T16:27:25","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.bghaber.org\/bghaber\/?p=15988"},"modified":"2015-08-22T19:31:37","modified_gmt":"2015-08-22T16:31:37","slug":"casus-degildim","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.bghaber.org\/bghaber\/casus-degildim\/","title":{"rendered":"Casus De\u011fildim!"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><img data-recalc-dims=\"1\" height=\"130\" width=\"130\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bghaber.org\/bghaber\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/12\/sakir-arslantas-130x130.jpg?resize=130%2C130\" alt=\"sakir arslantas\" \/>\u015eakir ARSLANTA\u015e<\/p>\n<p>Konu: <strong>Unutmad\u0131k! Unutmamal\u0131y\u0131z! Unutturmamal\u0131y\u0131z! Unutmayaca\u011f\u0131z!<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>21 A\u011fustos 1989\u2019da s\u0131n\u0131r kap\u0131s\u0131 kapand\u0131. Silistre, Dobruca, Varna, Gerlovo, Balkan \u00f6n\u00fc ve Balkan arkas\u0131ndan, Rodop yama\u00e7lar\u0131ndan inen b\u00fct\u00fcn patikalar, yollar yaya ve araba, tren garlar\u0131 yolcu doluydu. K\u00f6klerinden kopabilenler, \u201c<strong>Allah\u2019\u0131n dedi\u011fi olur<\/strong>!\u201d inanc\u0131yla gidiyorlard\u0131.<\/p>\n<p>Osmanl\u0131n\u0131n son ocaklar\u0131n\u0131 da s\u00f6nd\u00fcr\u00fcyoruz havalar\u0131na giren, kan\u0131 bozuklar, hangi T\u00fcrk evine konay\u0131m hesab\u0131 pe\u015findeyken, ba\u011f bah\u00e7elerde g\u00f6z gezdirenler, \u00a0\u00a0ba\u015f\u0131bo\u015f sal\u0131nm\u0131\u015f hayvanlardan yakalayabildiklerine b\u0131\u00e7ak \u00e7ekiyor, sanki T\u00fcrkleri kesiyorlard\u0131. K\u0131y\u0131lan hayvanlar\u0131n kan\u0131 akmadan \u0131zgara kurmaya acele edenlere \u201c<strong>Ne yap\u0131yorsunuz<\/strong>?\u201d der gibi k\u00f6p\u00fcren k\u0131rm\u0131z\u0131 \u015faraplar kan kabart\u0131yordu.<\/p>\n<p>Y\u00fcrekler a\u011fza gelmi\u015fti. Boh\u00e7a s\u0131kanlar yang\u0131ndan mal ka\u00e7\u0131r\u0131r gibi ko\u015fu\u015fuyordu. \u0130kircimliler mal m\u00fclk hesab\u0131nda iti\u015fip didi\u015ferek kak\u0131\u015f\u0131yorlard\u0131. Tela\u015fa seyirci kalanlar da yok de\u011fildi.<\/p><div id=\"bghab-1421920540\" class=\"bghab-icerik-icine bghab-entity-placement\"><script async src=\"\/\/pagead2.googlesyndication.com\/pagead\/js\/adsbygoogle.js?client=ca-pub-6203283170189293\" crossorigin=\"anonymous\"><\/script><ins class=\"adsbygoogle\" style=\"display:block; text-align:center;\" data-ad-client=\"ca-pub-6203283170189293\" \ndata-ad-slot=\"7303146466\" \ndata-ad-layout=\"in-article\"\ndata-ad-format=\"fluid\" data-full-width-responsive=\"true\"><\/ins>\n<script> \n(adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({}); \n<\/script>\n<\/div>\n<p>Ben bu sat\u0131rlar\u0131 yazarken, yan bilgisayarda, Yunan Ba\u015fbakan\u0131 \u00c7ipros\u2019un g\u00f6revden ayr\u0131l\u0131rken Naz\u0131m Hikmet\u2019e tutunarak \u201c<strong>Daha iyi g\u00fcnler, ya\u015fanmam\u0131\u015f g\u00fcnlerdir\u201d<\/strong> umut dizesini nemli g\u00f6zlerle s\u00f6yledi\u011fine g\u00f6z\u00fcm kayd\u0131. G\u00f6z dedi\u011fin, vatandan kovulurken ve iktidar uzakla\u015f\u0131rken hep ayn\u0131, ya\u015far\u0131veriyor. Ben kimsenin zorla a\u011flad\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 g\u00f6rmedim. Bu i\u015fin yapmac\u0131\u011f\u0131 yok S\u0131k\u0131narak a\u011flamak olmuyor mu ne! Tm 26 y\u0131l \u00f6nce bug\u00fcn \u00f6yleydi, ya\u015farmam\u0131\u015f T\u00fcrk g\u00f6z\u00fc kalmam\u0131\u015ft\u0131. Bir milletin beraberce gamlanmas\u0131 hay\u0131r alameti olamazd\u0131! \u00a0Analar\u0131m\u0131z, bac\u0131lar\u0131m\u0131z iki g\u00f6z\u00fc iki \u00e7e\u015fme; babalar\u0131m\u0131z yutkunduk\u00e7a yutkunuyor; \u201c<strong>g\u00f6\u00e7\u00fcn<\/strong>\u201d anlam\u0131n\u0131 bilmeyen \u00e7ocuklar \u015fa\u015f\u0131rm\u0131\u015f bak\u0131\u015f\u0131rken, birbirine sar\u0131l\u0131yor, arabulan bir defa daha koklamak i\u00e7in okuluna ko\u015fuyor, rahlesini \u00f6p\u00fcyordu. Ortada kalan kedi k\u00f6pek bu tela\u015fa anlam veremiyordu.<\/p>\n<p>\u201c<strong>Bu i\u015fi de bitirdik!<\/strong>\u201d gururuyla burnu dikilenler, yola d\u00fc\u015fmeye zorlad\u0131klar\u0131na hayvanca davran\u0131yor, sorana cevap, su isteyene su vermiyordu. Benzini bitenler kenara \u00e7ekilip araba itiyordu. Ara s\u0131ra boh\u00e7a a\u00e7\u0131p iki yudum almak isteyenlerse, yakan a\u011fustos s\u0131ca\u011f\u0131 alt\u0131nda y\u00fcr\u00fcd\u00fck\u00e7e uzayan yolca kururken kemikle\u015fen k\u00f6y ekme\u011finden lokma koparmada iyice zorlan\u0131yordu. Par\u00e7alanmak istemeyen somunlar, birbirinden kopmak istemeyen insanlar\u0131 and\u0131r\u0131rken, sanki hepsi a\u011f\u0131z birli\u011fi yap\u0131yor ve \u201c<strong>sizin burada yiyece\u011finiz daha \u00e7ok ekmek var, gitmeyin, d\u00f6n\u00fcn!<\/strong>\u201d diyordu. T\u00fcrklerden h\u0131rs\u0131n\u0131 alamam\u0131\u015f \u201c<strong>silahl\u0131 refakat\u00e7iler<\/strong>\u201d ise yol boyunda al\u0131\u015f veri\u015f yap\u0131lmas\u0131na, k\u00f6y f\u0131r\u0131nlar\u0131ndan taze ekmek al\u0131nmas\u0131na, \u00e7e\u015fmelerden su doldurulmas\u0131na izin vermiyordu. Orak vaktiydi. Ba\u015faklar b\u00fck\u00fclm\u00fc\u015f, \u201c<strong>biz sizsin ne yapar\u0131z<\/strong>\u201d der gibiydi. Yollara g\u00f6n\u00fcl vermek zorunda kalm\u0131\u015f olanlar \u201c<strong>Daha iyi g\u00fcnler, ya\u015fanmam\u0131\u015f g\u00fcnlerdir!<\/strong>\u201d umuduyla ANAVATANA y\u00fcr\u00fcyordu.<\/p>\n<p>Oca\u011f\u0131ndan kopamayanlar da vard\u0131. Yola d\u00fc\u015fmelerini al\u0131koyan yatalak hastalar, hastanelerden taburca olamayanlar, g\u00fcn\u00fc geldi gelecek gelinler, asker oca\u011f\u0131nda yavrular, yeni tutuklular ve hapishanelerde \u00e7\u00fcr\u00fct\u00fclmeye devam edilenler vb vb vard\u0131.<\/p>\n<p>Onlardan biri de art\u0131k 80 ya\u015fa merdiven dayam\u0131\u015f Razgratl\u0131 M\u00fcm\u00fcn \u00c7ak\u0131rov\u2019tu. S\u0131n\u0131r\u0131n kapand\u0131\u011f\u0131 g\u00fcn 11 y\u0131l 289-uncu g\u00fcn i\u00e7erdeydi. 7 hapishanenin de\u011fi\u015fik h\u00fccre ve ko\u011fu\u015flar\u0131na bu y\u0131llar\u0131n her g\u00fcn\u00fcn\u00fc t\u0131rnaklar\u0131yla kaz\u0131d\u0131. \u201c<strong>\u00c7ok tehlikeli bir T\u00fcrk casusu oldu\u011fundan<\/strong>\u201d t\u0131rnaklar\u0131n\u0131 kesmesi i\u00e7in \u00e7ak\u0131 b\u0131\u00e7ak vermediler. Bu ihtiyac\u0131n\u0131 duvar \u00e7izerek giderdi. O, halen sa\u011f salim, dayanabildi. T\u00fcrkiye\u2019de ya\u015f\u0131yor. Kendisine uzun \u00f6m\u00fcrler dilerken, tarif edilmesi g\u00fc\u00e7 \u00e7ilelere dayanan kahramanlar\u0131m\u0131zdan birinin ya\u015fam \u00f6yk\u00fcs\u00fcn\u00fc anlat\u0131yoruz.<\/p>\n<p>\u201c<strong>B\u00fcy\u00fck G\u00f6\u00e7<\/strong>\u201d selinin akmaya ba\u015flad\u0131\u011f\u0131 kula\u011f\u0131ma geldi\u011finde, i\u00e7ime umut k\u0131v\u0131lc\u0131m\u0131 d\u00fc\u015ft\u00fc.\u00a0 Ebad\u0131n\u0131 s\u00f6yleyemem, \u00e7\u00fcnk\u00fc neyin b\u00fcy\u00fck ve neyin k\u00fc\u00e7\u00fck oldu\u011funu de\u011ferlendirebilecek durumda de\u011fildim. \u0130\u00e7eri d\u00fc\u015feli 5 defa \u201c<strong>af<\/strong>\u201d \u00e7\u0131kt\u0131\u011f\u0131nda, m\u00fcebbet olsam da,\u00a0 umutland\u0131m umutlanmas\u0131na, ama kalp at\u0131\u015flar\u0131m h\u0131zlanmam\u0131\u015ft\u0131. Bu defa haber ald\u0131\u011f\u0131m olay ba\u015fka bir \u015feydi. G\u00f6\u00e7 seli bamba\u015fka bir \u015fey, beni de al\u0131p g\u00f6t\u00fcrebilirdi. Bu k\u0131v\u0131lc\u0131m de\u011fil, bulutsuz g\u00f6ky\u00fcz\u00fcnden d\u00fc\u015fen bir \u015fim\u015fekti. Koskocaman Bulgaristan\u2019da T\u00fcrk olarak bir tek ben kalacak de\u011fildim ya! F\u0131rsat f\u0131rsatt\u0131r belki benden kurtulmak isterler, diye d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnd\u00fcm. 1989 a\u011fustosunda yatan idaml\u0131k T\u00fcrklerin say\u0131s\u0131n\u0131 bilmiyordum, art\u0131k biliyorum, 7 ki\u015fiymi\u015fiz.<\/p><div id=\"bghab-1498401302\" class=\"bghab-icerik-icine-10-paragraf bghab-entity-placement\"><script async src=\"\/\/pagead2.googlesyndication.com\/pagead\/js\/adsbygoogle.js?client=ca-pub-6203283170189293\" crossorigin=\"anonymous\"><\/script><ins class=\"adsbygoogle\" style=\"display:block; text-align:center;\" data-ad-client=\"ca-pub-6203283170189293\" \ndata-ad-slot=\"7303146466\" \ndata-ad-layout=\"in-article\"\ndata-ad-format=\"fluid\" data-full-width-responsive=\"true\"><\/ins>\n<script> \n(adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({}); \n<\/script>\n<\/div>\n<p>\u0130\u00e7eride, ayd\u0131nl\u0131\u011f\u0131, insanlar\u0131n y\u00fcz\u00fcn\u00fc, \u00f6zg\u00fcrl\u00fc\u011f\u00fcn rengini tamamen unutmu\u015ftum. \u00d6m\u00fcrl\u00fck olmak, ba\u015fka bir \u015feye benzemez. Bekleyi\u015fin hedefi, yatan\u0131n kendi hassasiyetini kendisinin yok etmesi, belle\u011fini s\u00f6k\u00fcp atmas\u0131, bilincini s\u00f6nd\u00fcrmesidir. A\u015fk\u0131n \u00f6mr\u00fc 2.5 y\u0131ld\u0131r diyenler,\u00a0 idaml\u0131k birinin hangi g\u00fcne\u015fin bat\u0131\u015f\u0131n\u0131 bekledi\u011fini asla s\u00f6yleyemez.<\/p>\n<p>Umut kesilmiyor. K\u0131v\u0131lc\u0131m sand\u0131\u011f\u0131m y\u0131ld\u0131r\u0131m\u0131n kalbimi nas\u0131l deldi\u011fini unutamam. Tutukland\u0131\u011f\u0131m g\u00fcn de \u00f6yle olmu\u015ftu. Kelep\u00e7eler bileklerime, Razgrad \u015fehrinde Bulgaristan Kom\u00fcnist Partisi (BKP) \u0130l Komitesi binas\u0131nda bulunan ofisimde tak\u0131ld\u0131. G\u00fcn ortas\u0131yd\u0131. \u0130l muhabiri oldu\u011fum BKP Merkez Komitesi merkez yay\u0131n organ\u0131 \u201cYeni \u0130\u015f\u0131k \u2013 Nova Svetlina\u201d gazetesine Sevar k\u00f6y\u00fc inek \u00e7iftli\u011finin ba\u015far\u0131lar\u0131 ve bu ba\u015far\u0131lar\u0131n k\u00f6yl\u00fclerin sosyal ya\u015fam\u0131na yans\u0131mas\u0131 \u00fcst\u00fcne bir \u00f6vg\u00fc yaz\u0131s\u0131 kaleme al\u0131yordum. Yaz\u0131n\u0131n tam ortas\u0131nda merkezden bir telefon ald\u0131m ve gazetenin Tar\u0131m \u0130\u015fleri \u015eubesi M\u00fcd\u00fcr Yard\u0131mc\u0131s\u0131 benden r\u00f6portaj\u0131mda baz\u0131 ineklerin isimlerini de kaydetmemi \u0131srar ediyordu. Tam o d\u00f6nem, T\u00fcrklerin isminin de\u011fi\u015ftirilece\u011fi hi\u00e7 birimizin akl\u0131na bile esmese de, iri ba\u015f hayvanlara Bulgarca isim tak\u0131lmas\u0131 kampanyas\u0131 vard\u0131. Ben de. \u201c<strong>Tamam, tamam<\/strong>!\u201d dedim ve sayfay\u0131 yeniden yazarak en fazla s\u00fctt\u00fc \u201cMariya\u201d adl\u0131 ine\u011fin verdi\u011fini, \u201cKatya\u201d isimli buza\u011f da her g\u00fcn 2 kilo b\u00fcy\u00fcd\u00fc\u011f\u00fcn\u00fc ekledim. Kap\u0131 \u00e7al\u0131nd\u0131. \u0130\u00e7eri tan\u0131mad\u0131\u011f\u0131m iki sivil girdi. D\u0131\u015far\u0131da \u00fcniformal\u0131 2 milis daha oldu\u011funu kap\u0131 aras\u0131ndan g\u00f6rebildim.<\/p>\n<p>&#8211;\u00a0\u00a0 \u201c<strong>Buyurun yolda\u015flar, nas\u0131l yard\u0131mc\u0131 olabilirim<\/strong>?\u201d Dememe kalmad\u0131.<\/p>\n<p>\u2013 \u00a0\u00a0\u201c<strong>Kalk, \u015f\u00f6yle kenara \u00e7ekil<\/strong>!\u201d Derken hemen arama tarama ba\u015flad\u0131. Raf\u0131mda \u00f6n s\u0131ra duran Vladimir \u0130li\u00e7 Lenin\u2019in \u201c <strong>Solculuk, Kom\u00fcnizmin \u00c7ocukluk Hastal\u0131\u011f\u0131<\/strong>\u201d kitab\u0131n\u0131 kar\u0131\u015ft\u0131ran sivillerden biri, \u00a0elindeki k\u00e2\u011f\u0131d\u0131 birden bana uzatarak,<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>\u201c<strong>Bu ne?<\/strong>\u201d Dedi.<\/li>\n<li>\u201c<strong>Bilmiyorum!<\/strong>\u201d Demeye kalmad\u0131. Gerek\u00e7esi okunmadan kelep\u00e7elerim tak\u0131ld\u0131.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>Sivilin dirse\u011finden \u00e7\u0131kard\u0131\u011f\u0131 ka\u011f\u0131tta <strong>Razgrad garnizon komutanl\u0131\u011f\u0131nda g\u00f6rev alan subaylar\u0131n adresleri vard\u0131.<\/strong> Evimi de arand\u0131. Burada da ba\u015fka bir kitab\u0131m\u0131n i\u00e7inde ba\u015fka bir k\u00e2\u011f\u0131t bulundu. Onda da <strong>Razgrad Antibiyotik Fabrikas\u0131nda liste d\u0131\u015f\u0131 \u00fcretilen ila\u00e7 katk\u0131 maddelerinin ismi <\/strong>s\u0131ralanm\u0131\u015ft\u0131.<\/p><div id=\"bghab-2292987912\" class=\"bghab-icerik-icine-15-paragraf bghab-entity-placement\"><script async src=\"\/\/pagead2.googlesyndication.com\/pagead\/js\/adsbygoogle.js?client=ca-pub-6203283170189293\" crossorigin=\"anonymous\"><\/script><ins class=\"adsbygoogle\" style=\"display:block; text-align:center;\" data-ad-client=\"ca-pub-6203283170189293\" \ndata-ad-slot=\"7303146466\" \ndata-ad-layout=\"in-article\"\ndata-ad-format=\"fluid\" data-full-width-responsive=\"true\"><\/ins>\n<script> \n(adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({}); \n<\/script>\n<\/div>\n<p>T\u00fcrkiye Cumhuriyeti\u2019ne casusluk yapmaktan yarg\u0131land\u0131m. Kom\u00fcnisttim. Partiden at\u0131lmadan yarg\u0131lanmam m\u00fcmk\u00fcn de\u011fildi. BKP MK\u2019 nden g\u00f6nderilen ve duru\u015fmada okunan Fahrettin Halilov yolda\u015f imzal\u0131 bir yaz\u0131da \u201c<strong>bilin\u00e7li ve sad\u0131k bir kom\u00fcnist oldu\u011fum, bana atfedilen su\u00e7larda parma\u011f\u0131m oldu\u011funa inanmad\u0131klar\u0131<\/strong>\u201d ifade edilmi\u015fti. Beni su\u00e7layan ve idam cezam\u0131 isteyen savc\u0131l\u0131k makam\u0131na duru\u015fmada itiraz etmemi\u015fim, kendimi savunmam\u0131\u015f\u0131m, evlatlar\u0131m\u0131n ve e\u015fimin ismini bile hat\u0131rlayamam\u0131\u015f\u0131m, duru\u015fmada tek tan\u0131k olmasa da, s\u00f6zde ben her \u015feye\u00a0 \u201c<strong>evet<\/strong>\u201d deyip t\u00fcm evraklar\u0131 imzalam\u0131\u015f\u0131m. Mahkeme ba\u015fkan\u0131n iyi g\u00fcn\u00fcym\u00fc\u015f ve bana idam cezas\u0131 vermesi gerekirken,\u00a0 \u00f6m\u00fcr boyu hapishane nar\u0131nda yatmam\u0131 uygun g\u00f6rm\u00fc\u015f.<\/p>\n<p>\u0130\u00e7eri d\u00fc\u015fmem b\u00f6yle oldu. Bana ne i\u00e7irildi\u011fini bilmiyorum. 12 y\u0131l boyunca da \u00f6\u011frenemedim. As\u0131l olay hapishaneye girmemin \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcnc\u00fc g\u00fcn\u00fc oldu. M\u00fcd\u00fcr\u00fcn odas\u0131na g\u00f6t\u00fcr\u00fcld\u00fcm. K\u0131\u015f g\u00fcn\u00fcyd\u00fc. Hapishane buz kesmi\u015fti. \u0130ki ki\u015filik masa kurulmu\u015f ve ilk kadehte insan\u0131 \u0131s\u0131tt\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 bildi\u011fim \u201c<strong>Pliska<\/strong>\u201d kanyak \u015fi\u015fesi a\u00e7\u0131lm\u0131\u015ft\u0131. \u0130smini bir t\u00fcrl\u00fc \u00f6\u011frenemedi\u011fim orta ya\u015fta b\u0131y\u0131kl\u0131 bir sivil subay \u015f\u00f6yle ba\u015flad\u0131:<\/p>\n<p>\u2014\u00a0 \u201c<strong>Ho\u015f geldiniz M\u00fcm\u00fcn \u00c7ak\u0131rov yolda\u015f,<\/strong>\u201d derken elini uzatt\u0131. El s\u0131k\u0131\u015ft\u0131k.<\/p>\n<p>\u2014 \u201c<strong>Buyurun, \u00e7ekinmeyin, olan oldu, \u015fimdi oyuna yeniden ba\u015fl\u0131yoruz<\/strong>!\u201d Dedi. Susuyor, uyan\u0131yor gibiydim, ne oldu\u011funu anlayam\u0131yordum. M\u00fcebbet hapis cezam\u0131 idama \u00e7evirmi\u015fler ve adetlerinden oldu\u011funa ben son g\u00f6r\u00fc\u015fmeye gelmi\u015f olabilir, diye d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnmedim, demesem yanl\u0131\u015f olur.<\/p>\n<p>&#8211;\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201c<strong>\u015eimdi sen birka\u00e7 y\u0131l sizim i\u00e7in \u00e7al\u0131\u015facaks\u0131n ve sonra her \u015feyi hal edece\u011fiz<\/strong>!\u201d Diyerek ba\u015flad\u0131 niyetini anlatmaya. \u201c<strong>Hapishanede T\u00fcrkler aras\u0131nda bizim i\u00e7in \u00e7al\u0131\u015facaks\u0131n\u0131z. Biz sana g\u00fcveniyoru<\/strong>z!\u201d derken ilk kadehi kald\u0131rd\u0131 ve g\u00fcz\u00fcme bakt\u0131.<\/p><div id=\"bghab-5382212\" class=\"bghab-icerik-icine-20-paragraf bghab-entity-placement\"><script async src=\"\/\/pagead2.googlesyndication.com\/pagead\/js\/adsbygoogle.js?client=ca-pub-6203283170189293\" crossorigin=\"anonymous\"><\/script><ins class=\"adsbygoogle\" style=\"display:block; text-align:center;\" data-ad-client=\"ca-pub-6203283170189293\" \ndata-ad-slot=\"7303146466\" \ndata-ad-layout=\"in-article\"\ndata-ad-format=\"fluid\" data-full-width-responsive=\"true\"><\/ins>\n<script> \n(adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({}); \n<\/script>\n<\/div>\n<p>\u00d6m\u00fcrl\u00fck bir mahk\u00fbmdum. \u00dc\u00e7 g\u00fcnde bu kadere al\u0131\u015famam\u0131\u015f, gelece\u011fimi g\u00f6rememi\u015f, seme bir tavuk gibiydim. Asl\u0131nda ben bu duruma nas\u0131l d\u00fc\u015ft\u00fcm diye sormaya ba\u015flam\u0131\u015ft\u0131m kendi kendime de, g\u00f6zlerimin \u00f6n\u00fcne gerilen ko\u011fu\u015f duvar\u0131 \u00c7in Seti gibi, \u00f6n\u00fcm\u00fc g\u00f6rmeme, ard\u0131ma da bakabilmeme engel oluyor ve beni kendi i\u00e7ime s\u0131k\u0131\u015ft\u0131rd\u0131k\u00e7a, eziliyordum. Kadehi kald\u0131r\u0131rken, kapana d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcr\u00fcld\u00fc\u011f\u00fcm\u00fc, \u201c<strong>T\u00fcrk casusu<\/strong>\u201d de\u011fil, \u201c<strong>Bulgar ajan\u0131<\/strong>\u201d yap\u0131lmak istedi\u011fimin fark\u0131na vard\u0131m. Fark\u0131na varmakla duyulmak bilincin ilk basamaklar\u0131 gibi bir \u015fey de birden bire, bu i\u015fin ucu g\u00f6r\u00fcnm\u00fcyor, dedim kendi kendime ve ikinci yudumu davetsiz yudumlad\u0131m. T\u00fcrk\u00e7emizde \u201c<strong>alt\u0131 sakal \u00fcst\u00fc b\u0131y\u0131k<\/strong>\u201d diye bir de\u011fim vard\u0131r, \u00f6yle bir durumda hissetim kendimi. Arkamda T\u00fcrk casuslu\u011fu ve m\u00fcebbet hapis cezas\u0131, \u00f6n\u00fcmde de Bulgar ajanl\u0131\u011f\u0131 ve yine m\u00fcebbet hapis cezas\u0131 vard\u0131. \u0130kisinden birini se\u00e7mem isteniyordu. 12 y\u0131l h\u00fccrede kald\u0131\u011f\u0131ma g\u00f6re, hangi se\u00e7ene\u011fi se\u00e7ti\u011fimi anlam\u0131\u015f\u0131n\u0131zd\u0131r. Bu 12 y\u0131l i\u00e7inde bir kitap okumad\u0131m, bir mektup almad\u0131m, radyo dinlemedim, TV seyretmedim, inan\u00e7 ve kimlik de\u011fi\u015ftirmedim. \u0130smim de\u011fi\u015ftirilirken evraklar\u0131 imzalamad\u0131m. M\u00fcm\u00fcn \u00c7ak\u0131rov olarak \u00f6lmek istedi\u011fimi s\u00f6yledim. Bana Bulgar ismi ve soyad\u0131yla kimlik ve pasaport vermediler. Y\u0131llar boyu i\u00e7ime g\u00f6m\u00fcld\u00fck\u00e7e g\u00f6m\u00fcld\u00fcm. B\u00fcy\u00fck bir devletin casusu olmak da bunu gerektiriyordu her halde!<\/p>\n<p>Bulgar de\u011fil, T\u00fcrk de\u011fil,\u00a0 en iyi insan olduklar\u0131na inand\u0131\u011f\u0131m kom\u00fcnistler, BKP MK yay\u0131n organ\u0131nda \u00e7al\u0131\u015f\u0131rken bana bu tuza\u011f\u0131 kurdular. O g\u00fcn onlar\u0131 en k\u00f6t\u00fc insanlar olarak tan\u0131d\u0131\u011f\u0131m, yak\u0131p y\u0131kan ve \u00f6ld\u00fcrenlere benzemi\u015flerdi, yani fa\u015fistle\u015fmi\u015flerdi. Hapishane i\u00e7inde mi, d\u0131\u015far\u0131da m\u0131, yabanc\u0131 bir devlette mi, nerede kullan\u0131lmak istendi\u011fimi bir t\u00fcrl\u00fc \u00f6\u011frenemedim.<\/p>\n<p>Sonu olmayan \u00e7ileleri her g\u00fcn dalga dalga kucaklay\u0131p damla damla \u00f6z\u00fcmserken ans\u0131z\u0131n \u00e7atlayan \u015fim\u015fek d\u00fcnyam\u0131 de\u011fi\u015ftirdi. Kurtulu\u015f umudu kendi kendine alevlendi\u011fi gibi, durup dururken heyecandan titremeye ba\u015fl\u0131yordum. Tamamen kurumu\u015f g\u00f6z ayazmalar\u0131m\u0131n ya\u015fard\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 hissettim.<\/p>\n<p>Belle\u011finin insan\u0131n her \u015feyini bir damlada toplayan bir ate\u015f tanesi oldu\u011funu d\u0131\u015far\u0131dayken bir yerde okumu\u015ftum ve haf\u0131zam\u0131n canlanmaya ba\u015flad\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 fark edince, yeniden korktum. Belle\u011fim 11 y\u0131l 289 g\u00fcnden beri beslenmemi\u015fti!\u201d Canlanabilmesi m\u00fcmk\u00fcn olabilir miydi? Canlanma bile bir i\u015fe yarar m\u0131yd\u0131. Herkes T\u00fcrkiye\u2019yi boylarsa beni tan\u0131yan kalmayacakt\u0131!<\/p>\n<p>Akl\u0131m, 11 y\u0131l 289 g\u00fcn eski bir haf\u0131zan\u0131n hurda oldu\u011funa tak\u0131ld\u0131. Benden ihtiyac\u0131 olan kimse olmay\u0131nca ne yapabilirdim. \u00d6lm\u00fc\u015f bir umudu canland\u0131rmak g\u00fc\u00e7t\u00fc. Ba\u015f\u0131m a\u011farmaya ba\u015flad\u0131\u011f\u0131nda kafatas\u0131 sinirlerim \u00f6lmemi\u015f hen\u00fcz diye sevindim. \u0130nsan umudunu mahveden ise bo\u015f umutlard\u0131. \u0130\u00e7erdeyken 5 defa \u201c<strong>af<\/strong> \u201c\u00e7\u0131kt\u0131, ben hepsi \u201c<strong>pas<\/strong>\u201d ge\u00e7ti. Akl\u0131mdan ge\u00e7meyen kalmad\u0131.<\/p><div id=\"bghab-1325047081\" class=\"bghab-icerik-icine-25-paragraf bghab-entity-placement\"><script async src=\"\/\/pagead2.googlesyndication.com\/pagead\/js\/adsbygoogle.js?client=ca-pub-6203283170189293\" crossorigin=\"anonymous\"><\/script><ins class=\"adsbygoogle\" style=\"display:block; text-align:center;\" data-ad-client=\"ca-pub-6203283170189293\" \ndata-ad-slot=\"7303146466\" \ndata-ad-layout=\"in-article\"\ndata-ad-format=\"fluid\" data-full-width-responsive=\"true\"><\/ins>\n<script> \n(adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({}); \n<\/script>\n<\/div>\n<p>Ama \u015fimdi her \u015fey bamba\u015fkayd\u0131. Her g\u00fcn birer iki\u015fer \u00e7\u0131k\u0131yorlard\u0131. \u201c<strong>\u00c7ile ve \u00e7ekinin bitti\u011fini<\/strong>\u201d herkese duyurmak isteyenler ko\u011fu\u015f kap\u0131lar\u0131n\u0131 alabildi\u011fine \u00e7arp\u0131yor, \u201c<strong>ben kurtuldum, hakk\u0131m\u0131 helal edin!<\/strong>\u201d derken adeta \u00e7\u0131ld\u0131r\u0131yorlard\u0131. Kom\u015fu k\u00f6yden Ahmet \u00e7\u0131kt\u0131ktan bir g\u00fcn sonra d\u00f6nd\u00fc ve d\u0131\u015far\u0131da olup biteni anlatt\u0131. Kabaran umudun nefsine s\u0131\u011f\u0131narak e\u015fime \u00e7ocuklar\u0131ma \u201c<strong>beklesinler<\/strong>\u201d haberi g\u00f6nderdim.<\/p>\n<p>Kap\u0131n\u0131n kapand\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 hapishane hoparl\u00f6r\u00fcnden i\u015fittim. Sesi sonuna kadar a\u00e7m\u0131\u015flar ve devlet a\u011fz\u0131ndan hayk\u0131r\u0131yorlard\u0131: \u201c<strong>oturun oturdu\u011funuz yerde<\/strong>!\u201d Bu haber beni yere serdi. 5 g\u00fcnden sonra g\u00f6z a\u00e7t\u0131\u011f\u0131mda e\u015fim ba\u015f\u0131mda, revirdeydim.<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><strong>Korkma, s\u0131n\u0131r hi\u00e7 kapanmamak \u00fczere yak\u0131nda a\u00e7\u0131lacakm\u0131\u015f<\/strong>! Dedi.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>Nas\u0131l oldu\u011funu anlamadan, hemen d\u00fcnyaya d\u00f6nd\u00fcm.<\/p>\n<p>T\u00fcrkiye Cumhuriyeti\u2019ne g\u00f6\u00e7 etmem \u015fart\u0131yla \u00fc\u00e7 ay sonra serbest b\u0131rak\u0131ld\u0131m. Yol kenar\u0131ndan y\u00fcr\u00fcmeyi ve k\u0131rm\u0131z\u0131 \u0131\u015f\u0131kta durmay\u0131 \u00f6\u011frendikten sonra, kendi ismimle pasaport ald\u0131m. M\u00fcm\u00fcn \u00c7ak\u0131rov olarak T\u00fcrkiye\u2019ye g\u00f6\u00e7 ettim. Sonra 25 y\u0131l daha ge\u00e7ti. 2014\u2019te memlekete gene d\u00f6nd\u00fcm. 11 y\u0131l 289 g\u00fcn yatt\u0131\u011f\u0131m, kokusunu \u00e7ekti\u011fim, karanl\u0131\u011f\u0131na gark oldu\u011fum, umudumu yitirdi\u011fim 7 Bulgar hapsini birer birer gidip g\u00f6rd\u00fcm. Gardiyanlar emekli olmu\u015flar. Yenileri gen\u00e7 ve toy! M\u00fcd\u00fcrler de\u011fi\u015fmi\u015f, beni kimse tan\u0131mad\u0131. \u0130\u00e7eri girdim, ko\u011fu\u015flar\u0131m\u0131 g\u00f6rd\u00fcm. T\u0131rnak izlerimi buldum. Bakt\u0131m, bakt\u0131m! Onlar da olmasa her \u015fey unutulacak m\u0131yd\u0131 diye d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnd\u00fcm! D\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fcyorum! D\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnece\u011fim! Her ki\u015finin ve her neslin kendi hat\u0131ras\u0131 var. Ku\u015faklar de\u011fi\u015ftik\u00e7e an\u0131lar g\u00f6m\u00fcl\u00fcyor. A\u015fk\u0131n \u00f6mr\u00fc 2.5 y\u0131l. Hat\u0131ralar\u0131n \u00f6mr\u00fc ise bir \u00f6m\u00fcr! \u00d6tesi size kalm\u0131\u015f.<\/p>\n<div id=\"bghab-2987366346\" class=\"bghab-yazi-altinda bghab-entity-placement\"><div class=\"bghab-adlabel\">Reklamlar<\/div><script async src=\"https:\/\/pagead2.googlesyndication.com\/pagead\/js\/adsbygoogle.js\"><\/script>\r\n<!-- bghaber-yaz\u0131-sonu -->\r\n<ins class=\"adsbygoogle\"\r\n     style=\"display:block\"\r\n     data-ad-client=\"ca-pub-6203283170189293\"\r\n     data-ad-slot=\"4222328180\"\r\n     data-ad-format=\"auto\"\r\n     data-full-width-responsive=\"true\"><\/ins>\r\n<script>\r\n     (adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({});\r\n<\/script><\/div><br style=\"clear: both; display: block; float: none;\"\/>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>\u015eakir ARSLANTA\u015e Konu: Unutmad\u0131k! Unutmamal\u0131y\u0131z! Unutturmamal\u0131y\u0131z! Unutmayaca\u011f\u0131z! 21 A\u011fustos 1989\u2019da s\u0131n\u0131r kap\u0131s\u0131 kapand\u0131. Silistre, Dobruca, Varna, Gerlovo, Balkan \u00f6n\u00fc ve Balkan arkas\u0131ndan, Rodop yama\u00e7lar\u0131ndan inen<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":13,"featured_media":12415,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"advanced_seo_description":"","jetpack_seo_html_title":"","jetpack_seo_noindex":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[6],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-15988","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-yorum"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bghaber.org\/bghaber\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/12\/sakir-arslantas.jpg?fit=130%2C168&ssl=1","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[],"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/pc2PfJ-49S","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bghaber.org\/bghaber\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/15988","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bghaber.org\/bghaber\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bghaber.org\/bghaber\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bghaber.org\/bghaber\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/13"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bghaber.org\/bghaber\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=15988"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.bghaber.org\/bghaber\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/15988\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bghaber.org\/bghaber\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/12415"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bghaber.org\/bghaber\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=15988"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bghaber.org\/bghaber\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=15988"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bghaber.org\/bghaber\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=15988"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}